phaedrus's Posts

Re: Do nicotine patches really help?

5/25/2007 4:44:41 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

kheyanne wrote
Do anti-smoking patches really help? Or is it just a placebo making you think it's working but really isn't?

Like many things in life the answer is: It depends on the person. I had tried to stop several times in the past. Yes, I know a very common story, but when I tried with patches I was amazed how quickly my cravings subsided.

On the other hand a mate of mine John, who smoked about the same level as me, seemed to get no real benefit at all. I stopped counting the number of times I saw him light up while he was wearing a patch.

Re: Why?

5/25/2007 4:52:19 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

Chronotrigga wrote
Why did you start smoking in the first place? What encouraged you? What made you smoke?

One reason that is often out of the person's hands is enviromental. If a person grew up with one of their parents being smokers they are more likely to start themselves, if both do the effect is even higher. i read this in a study some years ago. From memory it also had this effect even if the parents did not smoke in front of their kids.

Re: I'm fine until I'm in the Casino

5/25/2007 4:58:57 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

littlecat123 wrote
You know, I do fine until I actually get to the casino.

My question littlecat123 is this: If you know you loose control in the casino, and by the sounds of it you just keep gambling until all the money is gone, why go at all? Another poster sugested taking a set amount of cash. Why not take that cash and spend it on something else? A good night out with your partner of friends?

Re: 15 PIECES OF ADVICE TO BE PASSED ON TO YOUR MUM, YOUR DAUGHTERS OR GRANDDAUGHTERS, NIECES, AUNTS

5/26/2007 4:01:54 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

While i do realise that this list is to be taken as a bit of a joke, it reinforces one of the problems I have with the more bitter elements of the womens movement. I am the first to say that the treatment of women in the past (and still in many parts of the world, sadly) has been represhensible, but I don't think it servers anyone to take the approach of. "I am doing a positive thing for women, if I belittle and drag men down".

Re: What is this thread all about?

5/26/2007 4:08:46 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

sunshine wrote
A recovering christian I beleive is someone who has lost faith for wahtever reason and now wishes to return to the fold, at least that is how it appears to be in my mind

I think your defination may be off there. If we applied the same logic to the phrase recovering alcoholic it would be. "A recovering alcoholic I beleive is someone who has stopped drinking, for whatever reason, and no wishes to return to the bottle"

So I don't think that is correct.

I think this thread is for those people who feel christianity has been a bad influence in their lives and are trying to move on.

Re: Men are from Where???

5/26/2007 4:14:10 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

I'm sorry but the tone of this thread gets to me a bit. While agree that there are many men with problems lets not be short sighted and say they are the only ones with problems and issues. Both men and women cheat in relationships. However from my own personal experence men are more likely to brag about it, be more blatent about it and thus get caught more often. Women are more descrete but it still goes on.

Food and childhood

5/26/2007 4:22:00 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

A lot of issues people have with food can often relate back to how food was used as a reward by their parents. High sugar and high fat foods, soemtimes called comfort foods, were often given as a treat or when the child was feeling upset. This sets in motion a string of behaviours where when the person is feeling depressed or upset they eat these foods to bring on the good feelings of childhood. This can be a major factor in overeating and obeasity.

Re: Hyponotherapy

5/27/2007 4:04:34 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

mikeyikie wrote
and it actually works??

From personel experence I can say, yes, hypnosis does work. I did not use it to give up smoking, for me patches were the helping hand I needed, but I was part of Hyponotherapy research while at university. I did not expect it to work for me but it did.

Re: Why?

5/27/2007 4:07:31 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

kobegirl24 wrote
I dont think it's like that with everyone, my dad smokes three packs a day and it's been this way ever since i can remember, but i hate ciggs.

I did not say 'everyone who has parents that smoke will take it up themselves' simply that you are more likely to. There are many other factors, peer group pressure, a sence of rebellion, wanting to look more mature. etc etc. But being around adult family members who do is a strong influence.

Re: Porn is a jealous B!^@#

5/27/2007 4:13:08 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

It's funny. While I have watched my fair share of porn on video I have never seen the attraction of going to strip clubs etc. Watching a video is a bit of titalation when you are unable or unwilling to go out and get the real thing. But watching a woman strip in front of you and not being able to 'get involved' I find more frustrating than enjoyable.

Conflicting messages on Pronography

5/28/2007 5:05:00 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Several recent news stories here have had conflicting messages about this complex subject:
Teacher, mind expander, spice of life: porn's multiple positions
How porn is wrecking relationships One in three porn viewers are women
I would be breatly interested to hear what you all think about these articles. It seems like many thinks in life what can be very bad for some poeple is ok or even helpful to others.

Re: Teaching your children

5/30/2007 8:23:27 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Also you have to teach your children that if they do drink, itis better if they are open with their parents about it rather than hiding it which only leads to more problems in the long run.

Re: marijuana

5/30/2007 8:26:22 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Cymru Am Byth wrote
I've known alot of poeple to mixs their maijuana with tabacco. However I have also read that you have a greater chance of getting lung cancer from cigarettes than from maijuana.

One of the main reasons for this is that because tabacco is legal the people that smoke it smke more often than pot. So they get a higher does of cancer causing chemicals. Aparently maijuana has more tar etc in it but people smoke less of it.

Re: Fatty foods

5/30/2007 8:30:59 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

The problem is that prior to human civilisation, high fat foods were very rare by humans were very attracted to them because of their high claorie content. So now that high fat foods are easily avaiable and we are still crave them they end up being bad for us.

Re: Tolkien CommunityWell

5/30/2007 8:41:57 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Well, one defination of addiction is:

"A habitual or compulsive involvement in an activity, such as gambling.:"

And by this I would say yes it is an addiction. But I also usually add this to the defination.

"A habitual or compulsive involvement in an activity, such as gambling.:" Which leads to severe negative consequences in other areas of the persons life.

EG: If someone in the tolkien group was so involved that they lost their job because they spent all their work time organising events rather than actually doing what they were paid for then yes it is an addiction. Otherwise no.

Re: Alternative good addictions

5/30/2007 8:44:44 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

I don't think there is such a thing as a good addiction as an addiction is something that is having a bad effect on your life. It would be better to think of things like this as simply new interests or activites.

Re: tanning

5/30/2007 8:48:58 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

itsme24 wrote
You can die from tanning? I never heard of that.

Yes you can.

Your chance of contracting skin cancer is directly related to the amount of UV light you have been exposed to. UV light is what makes your skin change colour. It is a defence against the damage. Very tanned skin on a normally pale person is not a sign of health but of damaged skin.

Re: I'm a control freak

5/30/2007 8:52:51 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

You have to start to realise that you cannot control the world, no one can. Things from time to time will always not go the way you expect. Sometimes good, sometimes bad. The desire for control comes from the fear of change.

Re: What is this thread all about?

5/31/2007 5:06:33 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

HardworkinMom wrote
since when did Christianity become something anyone should recover from?

Like many things in life, something that is good can be used by the unscroupulous to bad ends. Think of the people who were molested by members of the clergy. It would twist them so badly that they may feel it is something they want to 'recover from'.

Re: Showers!

5/31/2007 5:10:15 AM phaedrus
53 Posts

this sounds like a mild form of OCD. Obsesive complusive disorder. I would suggest you speak to someone about this. I would sugest that you speak to your doctor about this and they should be able to point you in the right direction for advice and possible treatment.

Re: men in recovery

5/31/2007 4:51:10 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Part of the probelm is the percieved role in society for men. They are suposed to be the strong ones etc. Often this manafests itself in that men feel they need to be strong and tough it out by themselves. So that even when they realise they have a problem they are a lot slower in seeking outside help with it.

Re: Materialistic, is it a curse?

5/31/2007 4:54:15 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

It certainly can be.

To quote Tyler Durden (Fight Club)
"The things you own end up owning
you"

If they the aquiring of stuff gets out of control it can lead to the same kind of emotional rush that other adicts recieve when they have a hit.

Re: Do you suffer from depression as part of your addiction?

5/31/2007 5:02:06 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

i think that often these two are reversed. Someone who is depressed and does not realise it, or want to admit it and seek help for whatever reason, may start to use some drug as a form of self medication. it helps, for a while. But soon they end up with two problems. The depression is still there but now the have to deal with the drug addiction as well.

If during the recovery process they only focus on the drug addiction they will always have an uphill battle because the inial cause is still there.

Re: How to help somebody who's not asking for it?

5/31/2007 5:07:27 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Now this may sound quite harsh but...

You also have to ensure that, by trying to help them, you are not enabling the behaviour to continue. EG: You arrive at your friends and they have bills to pay but have been on a drinking binge for days. You clean them up a bit, pay some of there late bills (which they promise to repay, of course). All the while telling them that they need to get help.

If they do not believe they have a problem they will go out and do it again.

Re: DO the casinos set up addiction?

5/31/2007 11:08:14 PM phaedrus
53 Posts

Setting up addiction may be a bit strong but they certanly try and make you stay for as long as possible.
So you are less likely to notice the passage of time.
- No Clocks
- No views of the outside world
- Level of lighting never changes

So you are less lkely to leave
-Exits are hard to find
- comp drinks, meals and rooms - if you are winning.

Addiction Treatment

Alcoholism, Drug Abuse and Other Addictions