I really am glad to have read your thread- I am 21 years old and have 2 younger brothers- one 18 and one who turned 15 today. Although people don't think they are sluts just because I acted like one- they have been judged. Parents didn't let their kids come to our house and who knows how else they were affected. Much like your sister, I only hung with guys, and got the reputation- and I frankly didn't care. I can't imagine what it was like for my brothers, but it wasn't until I got clean that I even was able to see that my actions didn't just hurt me. For so long I justified my behavior by telling myself I was only hurting ME- While I know your sister's situation is not the exact same as mine there are many behaviors I recognize from what you said. I don't mean to be so frank, but there is probably little that you can do until she comes to a point where she can see what she is doing. You are strong for reaching out and clearly your behavior is that of someone who cares- if you haven't done so already, you may consider telling her just how affected you are by her actions. Don't hold your breath though- in my addiction I know I would have told you to get over it- but thats just me. Reaching out to people in alanon may really be a good outlet for you. I know my family have all gained a lot by meeting other people who have daughters or sisters who are also alcoholics and addicts. I hope this has helped you in some capacity, if theres anything else I can help you with it would be my pleasure- it's one way of making right all the wrong I did to my family- good luck- and keep your head up!

I'm really not even sure where to start. My sponsor told me to put all of this in a box in the back of a closet in my mind until I was ready to open it. So here goes- I am 21 years old and I've lost I think 12 friends and close aquaintences in my life... My first loss was at the age of 16 when a girl on my cheerleading squad Jessica and her best friend Tayrn were killed in a wreck that happened on the 4th of July. 2 of my other friends were also in that car and were both severely injured- but I was in the beginning stages of my addiction then and never went through any kind of grieving process- I was out of the country at the time and they were already buried by the time I got back... next my close friend Ryan died from pnemonia- he also was using heavily.... then I don't really remember in what order but I think it was Brandon, then Stacy, then Zed, then Barrell, then Lindsay, then Kevin, then Phillp.... all but one of which died from o.d. or drunk driving, or other drug and alcohol related deaths. These were all so close together there was barely ever time to get used to one of them being gone before it was time to go to the next wake. I don't even know how I am still here- becuase most of the time I was so much more into my addiction than any of them ever even got a chance to be. I still have not begun to deal with any of these losses and am not sure I will ever truly be "over it". I just wanted to cover it all up and I tried really hard to do that. One day the combination of all of that and my meth addiction just broke me down and I was finally able to ask for help. I have since relapsed and I went deeper than I'd ever been- I started shooting up and doing other things I never thought I'd do.... I am almost 6 months clean now and I am nowhere near ready to open my box. I know that one day God will give me the strength I need to deal with those issues, and stay clean through it as well.

I never would have thought that i'd believe like i do today. I was raised methodist until 4th grade and then we converted to catholicism- once i got into my addiction i got to a place where i thought there probably was no God and if there was one- He hated me! I know now that God is great and I talk to/ pray to Him all the time. Though my view may differ from yours I can say from my own experience that He is so big and can bring so much love and hope into a world that sometimes seems empty and bleek. I remember what it felt like- praying "whoever is out there- if you love me you will not wake me up tomorrow" and i meant it. I wanted nothing more than to just cease to exist, today i am so blessed to be alive. Not one week ago my entire world got turned upside down- My fiance flipped his lid, hit me, told me a was a b**** who should've gotten my a$$ whipped a long time ago, told me to move out and broke off our engagement- that same day i found out my grandmother was going to have to have kemo for her breast cancer that came back- I also moved that same day back to where I did all of my using- away from my sponsor, my home group, my friends, my church, to a place where all of my memories are of hatred and despair, loneliness, and getting high.... I'm here to say that if through all of this I can stay clean, and even have happiness at times, then God is no joke- the blessings in my life are many, and with Him I know that there IS a sun in my sky- although i have never been so lonely in my life- i KNOW i am not alone, and i never will be.

I'm a 21 year old recovering drug addict. My drug of choice was meth but I've been called a garbage can junkie- because it didn't really matter what it was, if it got me high I wanted it. Aside from drugs and alcohol I have been addicted to many things- pain, sex, food- or lack of, exercise, anything that made me feel different from how I felt. It has now been almost 6 months since I got loaded or really acted out on most of those addictions... Jan. 9th of 2006 I asked for help. A few days earlier my friend Kevin died from choking on his own vomit in a friend's apartment. He had taken all kinds of drugs and had been drinking as well the night (and the few days before). What got me was that I had been there the night before he died- and to this day feel like I should've done more... but after taking an evaluation- the guy told my mom and dad and I that he thought I should go to inpatient for 28+ days... not 3 days later I was off to treatment. After 16 days in detox and I believe 31 days at the treatment center, I moved into an oxford house. During my time in treatment I learned a lot about the disease concept and the 5 tools to use (1.dont pick up, 2. read the literature, 3. call your sponsor, 4. work steps, 5. go to meetings)- i also had lots of reading in the big book and the basic text..... once i moved into the 3/4 way house i went to meetings almost every day and started to meet other people in recovery.... just one month later i moved to another city to live with the love of my life- although things went well for a few months- i slowly quit going to meetings and not long after that I relapsed. Then i moved back to my home town a few months later- the drugs got the best of us. After maybe 4 months or so- still using and not willing to do much different- on halloween weekend after much partying and doing a lot of things i soon came to regret- i slit my wrists with a straight blade and ended up being comitted. the only thing was that after they stitched me up they told me that there was no room in the psych ward- so they stuck me in the hospital's detox unit- which at the time pissed me off but i am glad today that i ended up there. Since i got out about a week or so later I have continued to stay clean and sober and have gotten a sponsor and worked steps. things have been hard at times- especially recently- but with the help of God, AA and NA and my sponsor and a lot of people who love me- I've come out okay. There is hope for everyone- I know as long as I stay open minded and trust in my Higher Power that I will be okay- and I know today that I never have to use no matter what! I may want to but I know I don't have to- and thats huge for a junkie like me....