leighdu said:

Dartz said: I mean, taking up illegal drugs? It has the word ILLEGAL right in front of you, spelled out in a word recognized across the globe in 2000 languages, and among billions of people.

Why bother? Take one look at someone in rehab and you'll see why you should avoid them. What's the point in starting? You must be a fricken idiot if you just wake up one day and say "I feel like snorting crack".

In a perfect world, no one would ever try anything that is addictive and potentially lethal. You can't really pinpoint a certain reason on every person that has taken up illegal drugs. Many are ignorant to the fact that drugs are dangerous. Believe it or not, there a many undeducated people out there who have grown seeing drugs all around them, and feel that it's ok.

Then there are the other reasons that everyone has mentioned, and a million and one more. I think the education is the most important factor in helping people never start.

You'd think, though, that young people who don't fall into the category of underprivileged or uneducated and have gone to school (including college and post-grad schools), or even successful people who didn't go to college but were smart would know better than to do illegal drugs, yet if you look at the history of, say, cocaine consumption in the U.S. since the 1960s, it was just that subgroup of the population - middle- and upper middle-class, educated/intelligent - that was the "targeted consumer" of the dope dealers.  They - especially celebrities back in the 1970s and 1980s - made the use of cocaine seem to be glamorous, fun, and harmless...even though the adverse physiological effects of that drug have been "out there" since the days of Sigmund Freud.

Sadly, most young people - and I was like this myself, of course - don't think anything bad is going to happen to them, that they're too smart, too cute, too hip for disaster to strike when drugs or alcohol are in their lives.

Indeed, it's a vicious cycle...we help create the whole celebrity by anointing so-and-so as a "star," then we want to emulate that "star's" lifestyle, and then, when all is said and done, we then help tear that "star" down when he or she proves to be just a very frail and vulnerable human being surrounded by wanna bes, hangers on and enablers who want to take advantage of the now fallen idol....

leighdu said: My dad was a smoker, my mom has never been. I really can't say for sure that because my dad smoked, I became a smoker. I am sure there is a higher percentage rate of smokers who had parents were smokers vs. non smoking parents. I think in my case I was just a stupid kid. I knew all the risk factors of addiction but me and friends played aroung with cigarettes anyways just to try them. I always thought, just like everyone else, that I could always quit after I had fun messing around with them. Unfortunately it hardly ever works that way.

Ah, the self-confidence, sheer recklessness and delusions of our youth! I still remember very well being young, naive, and feeling like I could handle almost anything as a kid.  I think everyone in their tweens, teens, and early twenties feels this way about most things and don't realize how dangerous such a mindset is.

"Faith in your friends is NEVER a weakness." - from a Star Wars "philosophy" poster

"Some men see things the way they are and say 'Why?'  I dream of things that never where and ask 'Why not?' " - a favorite quote often spoken by Robert F. Kennedy

"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." Yoda, Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

"Our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this planet. We all breathe the same air. We all cherish our children's future. And we are all mortal." John F. Kennedy

Melissa said: Has anyone heard this story on the news!?  The mayor of New York is being forced to resign because he's admitted to spending over $80,000 on prostitutes.  The sad thing is he has a wife and three teenage daughters.  Not only is porn ruining people's lives, but sex addiction and easy accesability to prostitues can lead to a deadly addiction.  In my opinion, this has ruined his life because he has to step down from office, he's lost his reputation and dignity, and lost any respect from his children.  Not to mention his wife's trust. 

Um, it wasn't the mayor of New York City, Michael Bloomberg, who had to resign from his post, it was Elliot Spitzer, the Governor of New York State, who had to resign over his trysts with very expensive call girls.

I think the problem here wasn't just sex addiction, but the illusion that a hypocritical "Do as I say, not as I do" politician could mess around like that simply because he could.

leighdu said: Many teachers and schools encourage internet use to their students, and even give a list of recommended websites where they can go and learn, such as noggin.com or yahookids.com . My question is, what would be an acceptable amount of time for young children to spend daily online?

How young, though? Obviously the age of the child determines the length of an Internet session; I'd say, though, for a 5-8 year old, about an hour, max, and always with all sorts of filters and supervision!

leighdu said: Many teachers and schools encourage internet use to their students, and even give a list of recommended websites where they can go and learn, such as noggin.com or yahookids.com . My question is, what would be an acceptable amount of time for young children to spend daily online?

How young, though? Obviously the age of the child determines the length of an Internet session; I'd say, though, for a 5-8 year old, about an hour, max, and always with all sorts of filters and supervision!

Hi.

Sorry that I have not been here in a while, but lately I've been feeling very unhappy, stressed, and worn out.  I don't enjoy things I once liked, feel as confident about life as I once did, nor do I open up about feelings and thoughts as I once did.

One of the worst things about this whole new situation is that now I'm painfully shy, even with friends I have known and cared about for years.  I don't reach out to them for help for fear of burdening them, don't ask them for favors unless they are trivial, and sometimes I let them treat me however they please...if they want to ignore me for some reason, I simply let it slide, not daring to ask them if I did something wrong or hurt their feelings somehow.

And that's another thing: I'm always afraid I'm in the wrong in all my friendships.  If I'm somehow inadvertently in a situation where I perceive a friend is mad at me, I immediately assume it's something I said or did, even if the friend in question is not even mildly irked with me.

jdizzle said:

bettyblue said:

This is what bothers me.  The present Administration got us into the Iraq War by claiming Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction, which he did not have at the time.  Before the war, we were told the coalition forces would be greeted as liberators, and although many Iraqis did so, most clearly see us as invaders/occupiers.  The White House told Congress the war would basically pay for itself or be inexpensive....it's now costing us trillions of dollars and 4,000 men and women have been killed.

Here's the punchline: When Vice President Dick Cheney was reminded by an ABC reporter that two thirds of the American people are against the war, his reply was, "So?"

This is why I really hope Obama wins. He will take us out of the war while Hillary supports it. I think its time all our troups come home and just leave Iraq alone. Its their own country, we helped them and rid them of Saddam I think thats enough.

While bringing the troops home soon is a nice "feel-good" campaign promise, I doubt that any President, from either party, can simply say to 140,000 men and women (plus all their equipment), "Okay, pack up....we're leaving."   It's not quite that easy; the Iraqi insurgents and Al Qaeda people now shooting at us and blowing up things on the road aren't going to simply let us drive out the way we came in without shooting at us, and we can't fly the soldiers and Marines out without their tanks, Bradleys, humvees, trucks and other heavy equipment.

Also, yes, it's their country, but leaving in a hurry will create a bloodbath...and the argument for "just leaving them alone" is not exactly morally defensible...especially since it was our invasion that tore the country apart in the first place.

The problem, though, isn't saying to the Iraqi government, "Hey, guys, we've done our bit for King and Country; we're outta here. Let's sign a withdrawal agreement."  It's not the Iraqi government we're at war with, it's the Al Qaeda people and anti-government forces we're fighting with.

I don't think most people understand the psychology of the enemy we're fighting.  These terrorists or jihadists (holy warriors) aren't going to simply watch us pack up our equipment and drive/fly it out and wave goodbye....they will shoot at us till they feel they drove us out of Iraq.

Intrill01 said: I have seen time and time again than there are some people in relationships that will stray and cheat on their partners no matter how good the relationship is. Then there are others that would never even think such a thing. I wonder why that is ? Is it an addiction to the high of a new partner? Is it morals or the way some are raised ? Just curious what everyones thoughts on this are.

My feeling is that there aren't any simple reasons as to why some men and women stray and cheat; in some cases, it's because the cheaters feel they can do it and get away with it, others have no moral fiber whatsoever, while still others will do it because they have no self-control over their desires.  Sometimes they do it purposely, while many drift into an affair without planning on it.

Although I feel oodles and oodles of human compassion for addicts, I have none, absolutely none, for people who sell illegal drugs or sell legal ones for deliberate misuse.  They may see themselves as entrepreneurs who are merely filling a vacuum or respomding to a perceived demand for their product, or (if they are members of a minority) simply trying to "get by" in a "white man's world" that excludes them from better jobs and education, but when all is said and done they do it because it's a very lucrative "career" move that doesn't require them to work physically or get an education, especially a college education.

To me, anyone who sells "recreational" drugs is a social vampire.

I haven't traveled outside the US since 1993, so I have no clue as to television standard signals in other countries, but here the old NTSC analog broadcast format is going to be replaced by digital-only signals, which will free up many frequencies for other uses (don't know what uses) but at the same time making any non-digital-tuner TV absolutely obsolete unless people get converters that allow them to receive digital signals.

Considering this has been in the works since 1996, I find it hard to believe that TV manufacturers are still charging a lot for TVs that should be more or less standard next year.  LCD, plasmas, and other types of HDTVs have been in the market for years now, yet they are still priced at truly astronomical levels. ($1000 for a new TV? That's pricey!)

Do you have any plans on how (if you live in the US) you will deal with the February 17, 2009 phaseout of analog TV signals? Do you have at least one HDTV set in your home? Are you going to opt for the converter boxes?

Even though he hasn't been officially nominated as the Republican candidate for the Presidency, John Sidney McCain III has the required delegate count and no longer really needs to campaign for more, so it's likely that, barring an accident or other twist of fate, he'll run against either Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton in the November election.

McCain, by the way, was my preferred choice way back in 2000 when he first tried for the brass ring but lost to George W. Bush.  He comes from a traditional Navy family (his grandfather was an admiral during WWII, and his dad was a sub skipper in that war and eventually commanded the Pacific Fleet at the time the current Senator was a Navy pilot and POW during the Vietnam War), has a solid record as a member of both houses of Congress, and seems to be pretty fair-minded about many issues.

My only quibble with McCain 2008 is that he seems to be determined to follow the current Administration's policies in Iraq; I'm torn between realizing that we can't pull out all the troops at once like some liberals say we should, and knowing that we can't stay in Iraq indefinitely, which McCain has been quoted (or misquoted) as supporting.

McCain has bucked the trends of the GOP before on other issues, but I'm still afraid that if he wins, he'll be a continuation of George W.. Bush's failed policies.

Unfortunately, reaching a certain age doesn't automatically result in one's getting preferential treatment or newfound freedoms unless the people in a position to grant them see fit to do so.  Physical age often isn't matched by emotional maturity, and in many parents' eyes, if a child living under their roof doesn't earn certain privileges by assuming more adult responsibilities, they will not treat him/her as an adult until they feel its warranted.

I don't know much about your current situation, so I'll ask you this: Are you still in school? Do you have a job?  If so, do you contribute any of your income to the household? Are you in a relationship your parents disapprove of?  Do you do chores? Get along with everyone?

alessandra said: I've been 18 for about 6 months now and my parents still treat me like I'm 17 and it's soo ridiculous!  I can't stand having a curfew and checking in every hour.  Don't you think it's reasonable that I'm an adult now, and even though I still live at home I should be able to make my own rules?  I've talked to a few people and most people are agreeing with my parents!

Also, considering that the economy is taking a downturn and with an increasing spike in crime, it behooves you to start thinking less about such things as curfews and checking in as some sort of unfair punishment or perceived lack of trust.  Again, I don't know you or how mature you act, but I think you should thank your parents for worrying about you the way that they seem to be doing.

Another fact worth thinking about is that many over-18 adults now have to stay at home longer because even if they have earned a college degree, there are fewer jobs available out there.

leighdu said: Ok yes, it's a cartoon, but this is clearly a cartoon for adults in my opinion. Does anyone think kids should be allowed to watch this show? I say if they are least 16 or so, but the younger kids shouldn't be able to. It is amazing too how many parents I know that let their kids watch South Park, and then are amazed when they get in trouble at school for bad language.

Personally, I think the show should be aired REALLY late, like way after 11 PM in whatever time zone we are dealing with.  Of course, this is only workable when we're talking about really small kids...who don't have their own TVs with cable boxes and TiVos that will record the show for a more convenient time.

Stormstar878 said:

Dartz said: It's a fact, if a cable company has a monopoly going, they'll jack up the price every month and suck you into contracts that last for a year, resulting in you paying almost or over $1000/year just to watch some decent TV.

They blame it on having to do several callouts due to disrupted signals because of cable theft. Well if you were to actually deter it by doing random inspections and not have a huge pricetag, then maybe everyone wouldn't be stealing your service!

Yes, cable companies definitely overcharge. The good thing about it though, is unlike water, you don't really need it. It is nice to have decent shows to watch, it's not worth the price.

Here's the thing. Unlike water, you don't really need it, but your mind thinks you do.  Let's face it; not too many people nowadays feel satisfied with having just local TV channels piped in through an antenna.  The TV Guide listings don't limit themselves to broadcast networks and indie local channels anymore; they now include cable....and most people who love to watch TV feel left out if they can't watch HBO, CNN, MSBC, Fox News, or any of the specialty channels (Disney, Nick, A&E, FX, or Lifetime).....

How long can you go without watching TV?

And, of course, this would also include situations where you don't have much of a choice, such as a hurricane hitting your area and leaving it without power for some time.

To be honest, I think the most I could tolerate is a day or so. I don't watch over four hours a day of scheduled programming if I can avoid it, but I do need to watch at least some news and entertainment shows to keep informed and have some diversion other than reading.

Aries said: Yeah, and Harry Potter is Satanic and the number 13 is unlucky.

The so-called epidemic is nothing more than greatly increased awareness of it. If someone points out how rude something is, you'll notice the world and its wife starts doing it. Besides, autism is something you're born with, it's not an afflicted illness.

I agree with the whole awareness point you make, Aries.  It's just like the arguments I have with people who insist that the world is about to end because it's more full of wars, epidemics, incidences of "sin" and fornication, crime waves, and natural disasters than in the old days.

Not true. The world has always had wars, epidemics, and so on and so forth.  The thing that has changed is that the flow of information is way faster than it is now; no one during the Black Death years had Internet access, much less TV, radio, newspapers, or even telegraphs to disseminate news from all around the globe.

leighdu said:

jaslena said: I've been with my boyfriend for a while now.  And I've decided that I don't want to be with him anymore, but the problem is he has some issues, he can grow very enraged at times and irrational behavior.... so I'm actually scared to break up with him.  The last time we spoke I was so angry with him and tried to just leave his house and so he decided to break my keys then he jumped on my car to prevent me from leaving!  I really cannot take this anymore, nor do I want to be in a serious relationship anymore.  But what is the right way to break up wit someone when you're scared of how they'll take it and what they might do??  Sorry for all the info, it's not pleasant, but I'm desperate... thanks in advance. 

If you are afraid of his reaction, first let everyone you know that you are scared of his temper, and then 2nd get a restraining order to keep him away from you. If he violates it, then call the cops.

I agree with Leighdu wholeheartedly on this issue.  Informing relatives, friends, and co-workers about your boyfriend's irascibility is definitely a must.

The restraining order issue I also agree with, but I also recommend you take a self-defense class and learn something called "situational awareness" (SA), which basically means that you must be aware of your surroundings at all times and trying to think in defensive terms, such as always checking to see if he's following you and making sure you never, ever go anywhere where he might ambush you.   Sounds like I'm suggesting that you adopt a paranoid world-view, but let's face it; restraining orders work best when the person being "restrained" is rational and respects court orders and cops. 

This morning I was reading my Sunday morning copy of Parade Magazine and was totally bowled over by the cover story.  It featured the once-troubled and very much addicted (but very talented) actor Robert Downey, Jr., who I liked a lot in such movies as Chances Are and Chaplin, but whose relationshops and career nearly went down the proverbial toilet because of his alcohol and drug addictions.

I took the liberty of going to the Parade website to get the URL of the article so other members could read it: After fighting drugs and demons, Robert Downey says 'I rose from the ashes'    I really found it worth reading.

DrSeiser said:

Yep, IMHO, men and women are different. Statement of fact, not judgment.

We (men) socialized and identify with different role models, therefore we are different. But, since it is learned (initally outisde to in), we can unlearn it and relearn it in a more effective and efficience way.

Men have, traditionally, always been conditioned to think that aggression and leadership - both necessary for the male gender role of warrior/leader - are admirable traits mostly and have been celebrated in myth, literature, and history alike.  Hence the "Men are from Mars" bit of the title of that self-help book (which isn't a novel).  Some of the aggressive traits are innately male, yes, but I agree with DrSeiser when he says most of the "Martian" attributes are learned and not inherited.