ybpublishing2 wrote
How many of us can't make it one day without drinking a Coke, Pepsi, or another carbonated drink? I know that I have been very guilty of this. Even diet sodas are not good for us and still have these addictive principles.

Other than a mild case of Internet addiction and a need to hear at least some music once a day, this is my big addiction issue. Oh, I can get by on not drinking a can of Coke or whatever soft drink is handy, but I do have to have Coke (or Sprite) in the house or I am not myself at all.

ozzie wrote
I am wondering if anyone here is addicted to coffee/caffeine? One of my sons was addicted to it a few years ago and experienced really bad headaches when he didn't get his daily dose. He finally broke the addiction and now only drinks decaf coffee, tea and soda. However, he frequently has severe headaches to this day.

Oops. When I listed my few addictions in another thread, I totally forgot caffeine addiction. I only have two cups of coffee and usually one serving of Coca-Cola a day, but heck, I have to admit that while it's a minor addiction, it is one all the same!

I'm a straight guy, so my problem isn't that I'm attracted to the wrong men, but rather the wrong women.

Still, I know how it feels to be depressed and unsure of one's self after a breakup, even a necessary one. In my last relationship, I was the one who did the leaving because while my ex-girlfriend was a nice, sweet, divorced, and loving woman, she was also a jealous, smothering, and psychologically unstable person whose insecurities (caused by her own weight problems and past romantic failures) were too much for me to handle.

I say that I'm attracted to the wrong type of woman for two reasons: I'm really too shy in person and really don't go out as much, so my way of meeting women is, sadly, online. In my first year online, I had four very different "online girlfriends," two of whom I met in person. One of these was married but she was looking, as Yahoo calls it, and the other was my ex. I fell hard for the married one - even though, in all honesty, she wasn't the best-looking woman I've ever met - and for too long I held on to the misguided notion that someday, somehow, somewhere things would work out and we'd get together again and be a couple once she got divorced. People told me left and right to stop talking to her, that she only talked to me when she needed a shoulder to cry on if she was fighting with her husband, and that if and when she did leave, she'd be out of my life faster than I could say "Jack Robinson."

Although by 2004 I had pretty much reconciled myself to some of this wisdom, I still had some remnants of feelings for this, um...person, but what my friends told me did come to pass. She only talked to me when she had issues with her husband, and when she did get divorced, she suddenly stopped talking to me altogether.

It didn't hit me as hard as I figured it would; I had pretty much moved on emotionally and I didn't turn into a basket case because I had friends I care for and all that, but I know how hard it is to let go of even an unhealthy or incompatible partner.

I also share megan22's thoughts on your recovery period. Fight as hard as you can any temptation you have of getting back together. Even if your ex is a nice guy who didn't abuse you physically or emotionally, this is a time in which you need to focus on you and trying to improve what you perceive might be flaws or weaknesses, and also try to accentuate the positive qualities that you possess. Be strong, be patient, and be self-aware. Get stronger emotionally, and don't jump into a new relationship right off the bat. That's what I did when I met my last ex - I wasn't over my "loss" of my first love, so I went on to date Ms Jealousy Personified for four long and unhappy years.

Leighdu wrote
Would you consider a male, healthy, and doing very well in most every aspect of his life an alcoholic if : He drinks at least a case of beer every weekend to himself? He says he doesn't have a problem but he spends most of the weekend getting drunk, then recovering the next day. He claims he can stop anytime he wants, but that it is his business if he wants to drink or not and that it is not affecting anyone else.

I certainly would consider this guy - whoever he might be - to be an alcoholic. The fact that he only does his drinking on weekends is irrelevant. It's the amount of beer (at least a case? How many bottles or cans does a case have?) and the regularity of the consumption that matters, plus his "I can stop whenever I want/It's my business if I drink or not" attitudes are definitely "red flags" that this guy is an alcoholic.

lalajean wrote
I consider the addiction when someone gets home from school, immediately does nothing else but goes online, or when they wake up on the weekend it is the first thing they do and so on.

I have to admit that when I first signed up with Juno (my first ISP) back in 1999, I most certainly had Internet addiction. Back then we only had a dial-up connection, so I couldn't just log on at will when I woke up because I'd catch hell if I tied up the line before the agreed upon hour of 1 PM. At the time I wasn't aware of it, but I'd get all anxious and would watch the clock impatiently. If people weren't home at the time, I'd sneak on before 1 PM, just to check e-mails.

At night I'd stay on till almost dawn, and sometimes way into the morning hours. Needless to say, this messed up my sleep-cycles and made for a very bad situation with other family members.

Now that I have DSL, the problem is actually less acute; I think I'm online less, and I have friends who sort of feel I am neglecting them because I'm no longer online till 3 AM, but because I do work online (as a review-writer, mostly), I'm on more during the day. I no longer feel "online anxiety" or have to wait till a certain time to get on, so I think my addiction is dealt with. I do get upset when I can't log on because my PC breaks or the DSL network has issues, but not to the extremes of before.

alwaysright wrote

I don't usually keep track myself, but for someone to worry about how much sex he or she sounds like borderline obsession..

I don't know; the original poster might have a valid point and his tone didn't sound like he was worried about how much sex he was having. The question often comes up in other forums.

As for me, I'm currently single and not seeing anyone, but when I was, the frequency was 4 times a month.

Hi all.

I am not, at present, as avid a TV watcher as I used to be when I was younger. I don't, for instance, turn on my TV set (a new HD one at that!) first thing in the morning and watch till midnight day in and day out, but I do like to watch my favorite shows and the local/national newscasts.

Now that the writers' strike is into Month 3 and there's no end in sight, I'm beginning to think that for TV addicts who aren't into "reality shows" the lack of new episodes of their favorite series may be a blessing in disguise, since they won't be getting their fix of 24, Lost, or Heroes. The entire season of 24 has been scrapped, and unless things improve in the negotiations, most of the non-reality shows have only a handful of finished episodes before they go into reruns.

What do you think? Do you think the strike will force TV addicts to wake up and kick the habit (but not, hopefully, their sets)? Do you think reality shows will gain viewers from people who normally hate them but need to watch TV? Or will PCs, the Internet, DVDs, and video games fill the vacuum?

Hi all.

Lately, while pondering the issue of shopping addiction, I was reminded of how my now-late best friend, Richard, would go to the mall, head to a bookstore, and come out with two or three paperbacks at a time. He went to the mall at least four times a month, so on average he'd end up buying 48 or so new books a year.

Thing is, he never really read them. He'd read one or two chapters, then stop and place the book in his bookshelf. He never bothered trying to re-read or finish one, but when I asked him why he did this, he'd get all defensive and say he liked reading.

Is this an unusual addiction? Or is it just me thinking it was an addiction?

I'm not a smoker, and never have been, but I've known plenty of people who are.

Although some are friends or acquaintances, most of the smokers I know are relatives. My aunt Martha and her children (all adults over 40 now) are smokers or were last time I saw them, and my mom smoked from age 12 till she was 60 or so. (My mom smoked so much, in fact, that my clothes smelled of cigarettes and people thought I was lying to them when they asked me if I had cigs and I'd say "No."

If you're a cigarette addict and have been one since you were a teen or younger, was it because your parents smoked, too?

Vaminos88 wrote
I dont quite agree with cyber sex only because I would do that as a child and the person on the other side of the computer thought i was 24. You never know who your talking to, you picture yourself talking to a hot 20 year old when in reality the person having cyber sex with you could be 9, or 79! Picture yourself cybering with those!! that turns me off about it.

Your example, though, is an extreme one. You say you cybered as a child, which in and of itself is weird, to say the least, and it really is something you should have avoided. What were you doing, cybering at such a young age?

Second, I think that webcams, while not exactly a panacea, have pretty much eliminated the "who am I cybering with" mystery aspect.

Quenlin wrote
They already do; nothing below the belt or above the garter.

I hardly see it as a problem, I mean, there is nothing wrong with seeing a pair of boobs. There has never been a recorded case of someone suffering severe psychological harm after seeing a womans breasts.

The local paper in my country, The Sun, always has a topless model on the third page, and nobody complains about it. Maybe because Europeans aren't so tizzy about a topless woman in the tabloids.

Ah, yes. The Page 3 Girls. Samantha Fox was one, I believe.

Europeans have a much more open - and healthier - attitude about nudity and sex than we repressed Yanks. The best example I can think of to illustrate this is that when I was in Spain 20 years ago, the local edition of PLAYBOY was sold in kiosks on the street within reach of anyone. Not on high shelves or behind counters where you had to ask for it, but right there where you could pick it up and buy it.

at4101 wrote
I've really never understood why prostitution was illegal, but then again I've never done too much research on it. Anyone have any clue why it is prohibited ?

It wasn't always illegal, I don't think. Some cities had districts (red light districts) where bordellos and other places were legally established.

As to why it was prohibited? I think partly it was the influence of puritanical religious groups, partly because organized crime became involved, and partly out of genuine health concerns.

alexdg1 wrote

Quenlin wrote The only bad side-effect from constant masturbation is low sperm count in men, and that takes some crazy amounts. Going blind, hairy palms and cancer are all myths, masturbation actually reduces hormonal-based cancers. Heres the thing, 95% of people do it, 5% lie.

I've also heard that not only does constant masturbation - in men - lowers one's sperm count, but that constant manipulation of the penis results in loss of sensitivity in the genital area and therefore might lessen the pleasant feeling of intimacy with a female partner. If this is so, then yeah, I could see where excessive masturbation could pose problems.

I'm not too worried about low sperms counts, but the part about losing sensitivity "down there," especially if it affects my performance with women, does bother me - seriously. I'm not addicted to masturbation, but since it's my only sexual outlet at present, I certainly wouldn't want to overdo it if it will have repercussions later.

Hi.

I used to be a big-time computer game fan and I still like playing a few games, but at my age and with adult responsibilities, I hardly ever play any unless I have spare time.....

Because PC games aren't necessarily Internet-related, I will ask my question here: Can there be game players that love a game so much that they will neglect chores, jobs, family, and friends to play it? What type of games are usually prone for addiction? Does anyone here know a PC game addict?

Rocky wrote
I dont think the writers strike will have much of an impact. Once they
start writing agian, the addicts will go right back to watching the
shows. It may give them a break, but if your a TV addict I'm sure
you'll watch anything else not just the one show your waiting for. I
always set aside my sunday nights at 9 to watch desperate housewives,
but when it doesn't come on I still stay watching TV but just watch
something else.

Maybe it also depends on how deep the TV addiction runs. There is, I think, a real distinction between fans of specific shows that they will miss if they don't air but can literally live without, and addicts that can't function without having the TV on no matter what programs are on, so long as there's something on the television screen.

Aries wrote
You would be surprised how many people cyber over roleplay channels on the IRC. Some go a tad too far though, but it's always entertaining to watch people prove that they know absolutely nothing about anatomy. XD

Or, in many people's cases nowadays, watching others prove that they know diddly-squat about turning other people on, or spelling, or imaginative lovemaking, fot that matter.

Leighdu wrote

Quenlin wrote Quite a lot actually, everyone on my dads side, including my dad smokes, but on my mums side, it's really only my auntie. My granda used to smoke until he was diagnosed with diabetes, so he gave it up to keep himself going.

Kind of sounds like my family. Not one person on my moms side smoked except for her father. She has 3 sisters and 1 brother, and none of them smoked. My dad however, smoked like a chimney and so did his father. I also have 2 brothers and 2 sisters and all four of them smoke.

I'm not sure about my dad's side of the family; he died before I was two and I really don't know too many of my paternal relatives. He might have smoked, and maybe quite a few of his siblings may have, as well.

On my mom's side of the family, non-smokers are a rarity, even today when people know the risks and after seeing my grandfather be weakened by ephysema.

Quenlin wrote
I'm not sure if you could get addicted, I guess it's probably just a preference thing. I doubt you could wind up addicted to fellatio, but that would be a pretty funny thing to imagine.

I'm wondering, though, if the poster meant being addicted to "giving" or "receiving" a particular sex act. I, too, would consider that to be a fetish/preference thing, but still, it might be addictive in some way, no?

I have heard of Internect Addiction, of course, and maybe I might have commented on the topic in other threads, but I have been thinking about my use of Yahoo Messenger and wonder if I may be addicted to it.

Normally, I have it on most of the time when I'm online, and I try to not turn it off unless I am working on a time-sensitive project, but I really feel weird when I do turn it off even if it's for work....

So, am I addicted?

megan22 wrote

Fardreamer wrote I have heard of Internect Addiction, of course, and maybe I might have commented on the topic in other threads, but I have been thinking about my use of Yahoo Messenger and wonder if I may be addicted to it. Normally, I have it on most of the time when I'm online, and I try to not turn it off unless I am working on a time-sensitive project, but I really feel weird when I do turn it off even if it's for work.... So, am I addicted?

Nah, it doesn't sound like you are addicted to me. I am the same way. If I have to be online whether working or whatever else, I like to have my messenger on. I have never solely gotten online just to chat on messenger. See if any of these apply to you and this may give you a good idea if you are addicted to a messenger:

Do you use more than one screenname? How many messengers do you run? Do you have over 70 people
on your buddy list? Do you know all the shorcuts for all the smileys
by heart? Have you ever spent more than five minutes coming up with an
away message?

If you can answer yes to all of these you may have a little addiction going on there, but that doesn't mean it will affect you negatively.
"

With the sole exception of pet-sitting, my main source of income is online writing, so I have to use my PC as not only a source of information, entertainment, and socializing, but also as a tool for work...capital, if you will.

Right now, though, I only have one screen name that I use regularly, and I only use Yahoo! Messenger as my primary IM thingy. I have MSN's Live Messenger as a backup, but only as that.

And about the shortcuts for emoticons, no, I don't know them all by heart. Nor do I write Instant Messages that overuse IMese, ie. LOL, LMAO. I use those terms, but not to excess.

Rocky wrote
Do you think drinking a lot leads to using other drugs? I was drunk the first time I used coke and I got hooked on it ever since. But if I wasn't drunk I really dont think I would have accepted it.

Um, your intro already makes a point in and of itself. Alcohol, though legal, is a drug; it's a depressant and inhibits good judgment.

So, basically, yes, I'd have to say that drinking a lot would lead to using other drugs.

Leighdu wrote

Fardreamer wrote Rocky wrote I dont think the writers strike will have much of an impact. Once they start writing agian, the addicts will go right back to watching the shows. It may give them a break, but if your a TV addict I'm sure you'll watch anything else not just the one show your waiting for. I always set aside my sunday nights at 9 to watch desperate housewives, but when it doesn't come on I still stay watching TV but just watch something else. Maybe it also depends on how deep the TV addiction runs. There is, I think, a real distinction between fans of specific shows that they will miss if they don't air but can literally live without, and addicts that can't function without having the TV on no matter what programs are on, so long as there's something on the television screen.

I think that an addict is an addict. Yeah, they won't be able to watch their favorite shows, but most people addicted to televsion will always find something to watch. Most use television as a way to escape reality and lose themselves in another world, so if their favorite shows are not on, I am willing to bet there is much more out there they will watch. You have to remember also that with cable, there is a plethora of things to be found on t.v.

Thank goodness, then, that I'm one of those TV watchers that can get by on just watching the news or a couple of shows a day, but not one who would just watch anything for the sake of watching.

Of course, I'm disappointed that this season of 24 will not be on, but that's the way the cookie crumbles!

at4101 wrote

BettyBlue wrote I know this is a site where anyone can read posts and threads, so I won't get too graphic here, but I am wondering if sexually-active people can get addicted to a specific sex act. For instance, if a man or woman wants oral sex all the time, is that to be considered a mere fetish, or is it a true addiction?

I think a certain act could become an addiction. I've read and heard stories before where the only act a man would want is oral sex, and became so fixated on it that he was not interested in anything else but that. Day and night it is all he thought about, and at the risk of making his partner very unhappy that is all he was interested in. In my book that would totally be an addiction and one that could possibly ruin a relationship at that.

Thankfully, I'm one of those guys who doesn't like getting into a sexual rut nor sticking to one specific sex act. I think sex is best when both persons have a give-and-take attitude that results in mutual pleasure and not in just gratification of one partner.

at4101 wrote

Latifa wrote Yep the prices will increase and it will put off a few of us but for others it will definitely not do anything, I love fast food and only over the last year have changed my eating habits but would always go to McDonalds on my lunch break as it used to be the cheapest thing around to buy and the quickest.

I remember a time when a Quarter Pounder combo meal was 2.99. I would suck those things down and not gain a pound back in the day. Now they are almost 5.00 per combo and I don't dare touch them.

$2.99? Heck, I remember when a Quarter Pounder with fries and a drink was $1.99.

Problem is, the recession we are now in is going to usher in a wave of rising prices, starting with fossil fuels and gasoline and continuing up the chain all the way to food. So if anyone's a fast food addict, don't be surprised if prices go up even farther.

BettyBlue wrote
I'm not, by stretch of the imagination, a sex addict, nor have I ever been, but I'm sort of curious about this addiction, its causes, symptoms, and its treatments.



I know, of course, that there are psychiatrists, psychologists, and therapists whose job it is to treat addictions, but I am wondering if, just as a few cigarette smokers can quit cold turkey, are there any recovering sex addicts who have kicked the habit on their own?

I don't know any sex addicts; I know people who love sex but not really addicted to it....but I'm sure that if some smokers can quit on their own, why not sex addicts? It probably requires steely determination and a great deal of maturity and wisdom, plus a lot of faith.