OK here's my question.  The community I live in has been declared a high drug traffic area for years now.  I've already lost one child to drugs and my second is trying to figure out where she fits in a teen scene that is mostly driven by a drug culture (at least visibly)--when her boyfriend called tonight he was quite drunk and rationalizing his behavior.  I've been open with her about my drug use at her age--I was not an addict, because I was lucky enough not to be predisposed to it, not because I was pristine.  I'm concerned about the choices she might make in order to fit in.

Well if her boyfriend drinks, that's a strong indication that she might try alcohol.  Nearness is likeness no matter who you are.  I think you just have to step it up and set your boundaries early.  And it really shouldn't be an issue of what you did at her age, that doesn't justify anything.  I really wish my parents were more strict with me because I learned how to push all of my limits and now I have a lot of regrets.  But I promise you, she will thank you when she's older. 

im not saying that you are doing this, but i know my parents always sat around and just wondered what i was doing and being worried without ever asking me straight up. im not sure i would have been honest with them at the time and especially you said your daughter is a teenager trying to fit in. there are always commercials saying to talk to your kids about issues like these so they do know right from wrong and what is acceptable in your household. if her boyfriend is drunk dialing you im not sure if thats the kind of person you want your daughter hanging around. it is normal these days for teens to experiment with alcohol and drugs and sometimes i think its better to try it and figure out you dont like it, but that isnt the case for everyone. so out of all this i would suggest just talking more to her and finding out what shes doing.