I seem to be addicted to the wrong kind of man. My, as of Sunday, ex-boyfriend and I so clearly do not make a good couple. I came to that realization once again on Sunday when I told him I was done. This morning (Tuesday) I found myself wasting a roll of tissue missing him and wanting him back. What is wrong with me? I know we are not right together, but I do not want to be with out him. I mean he is not a bad guy and he did not mistreat me we are just very different type of people that desire different things when it comes to a relationship. How can I get him out of mind so I can move on to bettering myself and my world?

You could possibly be choosing the wrong men because you have things to work on yourself. Many times women/girls take the easy way out and hope that a man will fix their problems, and usually end up with a guy that has the same problems that they do.

Either way, most relationships are hard to end. You wanting him back and being depressed over it is pretty common. Just make sure you realize why you left him in the first place, and take time to yourself to analyze the situation better. The only way to get him out of your mind is to keep yourself busy and focus on YOU. When the thought of him pops in your head, immediately start think of yourself and what you would like improve, what you would like to do, etc. Many will tell you to find someone else immediately to replace him. I think that is bad advice. Get through the pain of this one before moving on.

I'm a straight guy, so my problem isn't that I'm attracted to the wrong men, but rather the wrong women.

Still, I know how it feels to be depressed and unsure of one's self after a breakup, even a necessary one. In my last relationship, I was the one who did the leaving because while my ex-girlfriend was a nice, sweet, divorced, and loving woman, she was also a jealous, smothering, and psychologically unstable person whose insecurities (caused by her own weight problems and past romantic failures) were too much for me to handle.

I say that I'm attracted to the wrong type of woman for two reasons: I'm really too shy in person and really don't go out as much, so my way of meeting women is, sadly, online. In my first year online, I had four very different "online girlfriends," two of whom I met in person. One of these was married but she was looking, as Yahoo calls it, and the other was my ex. I fell hard for the married one - even though, in all honesty, she wasn't the best-looking woman I've ever met - and for too long I held on to the misguided notion that someday, somehow, somewhere things would work out and we'd get together again and be a couple once she got divorced. People told me left and right to stop talking to her, that she only talked to me when she needed a shoulder to cry on if she was fighting with her husband, and that if and when she did leave, she'd be out of my life faster than I could say "Jack Robinson."

Although by 2004 I had pretty much reconciled myself to some of this wisdom, I still had some remnants of feelings for this, um...person, but what my friends told me did come to pass. She only talked to me when she had issues with her husband, and when she did get divorced, she suddenly stopped talking to me altogether.

It didn't hit me as hard as I figured it would; I had pretty much moved on emotionally and I didn't turn into a basket case because I had friends I care for and all that, but I know how hard it is to let go of even an unhealthy or incompatible partner.

I also share megan22's thoughts on your recovery period. Fight as hard as you can any temptation you have of getting back together. Even if your ex is a nice guy who didn't abuse you physically or emotionally, this is a time in which you need to focus on you and trying to improve what you perceive might be flaws or weaknesses, and also try to accentuate the positive qualities that you possess. Be strong, be patient, and be self-aware. Get stronger emotionally, and don't jump into a new relationship right off the bat. That's what I did when I met my last ex - I wasn't over my "loss" of my first love, so I went on to date Ms Jealousy Personified for four long and unhappy years.

Its just luck when you choose the wrong man. Hehe I always seem to
choose the wrong girl, I always end up getting cheated on. Maybe when
you two broke up its not exactly him your missing but just being in a
relationship. Thats what I would end up missing, but when it comes down
to writing it down on a piece of paper what I like about the girl,
theres nothing, but what i like about the relationship.. theres
someone to talk to, someone you think cares about you, someone you can
hug kiss, sex, all those things you know. I realised thats what I
missed, not the person.